How to be a Modern Day Enchantress Part I

 I wish I was an Enchantress living in the times of King Arthur and the Knights of Camelot. It feels like such a romantic period of time. I also feel that women knew who they were back then and used this knowing to love their men. If you read my blog you know that I often write about how important it is for a woman to know and touch the depths of her emotions and be able to stay centered no matter what a man does. This is the foundation of a modern day Enchantress. She lures her man to stay connected to her with her deep emotions and feminine mystery. See a great article below. :) 

 

10 Ways To Enchant Your Man: By Kristina Marchant

Learn some modern-day attraction tips inspired by Old-World wisdom!

Want to enchant your man?  Look at no further than famous fiction.  The original enchantresses in the legends of King Arthur forced knights to honor them with what was termed “courtly love”. Under the spell-powers of these magical goddesses, brave and fierce warriors learned to be gentlemanly and dutiful, and in return received devotion and sexual attention beyond their wildest dreams. Soon, even the most powerful of mortal men (wizards, even) were defenseless to the seductive powers of enchantresses.

Now it’s your turn to be a modern enchantress and have men addicted to you. Here are some attraction tips to help you inspire him to be your knight in shining armor and make him willing to do WHATEVER he can to HONOR you and your relationship:

Be like a jellyfish. Have you ever seen a fluther of jellyfish floating in a fish tank? Maybe even touched one at an aquarium?  Their lack of rigid body parts makes them soft and fluid, and their movements look almost sensual. When you are with a man let the image of a jellyfish make you a more sensual woman. Focus on softening your face muscles and relaxing your shoulders, hips, thighs, etc. (anywhere you carry tension). Even imagine a soft, vulnerable heart purring a tender beat in your chest. This will help you invite more intimate moments with him (a giggle, a whispered secret, a lingering brush of your arm against his, more loose and loungy body language, a more emotional response when he flirts, etc.). 

Sit on your hands. Anytime you feel the compulsion to do something to deepen the connection between you and a man (call him, fill in all the silences in conversation, make plans, cross the room to sit close to him, etc.), stop yourself. Instead just remain still, making no movements toward him… OR away from him (walling yourself off or playing a game of hard-to-get). Just remain available to receive his advances using the jellyfish image.

Be smart with your intelligence. A lot of smart women try too hard to show men how intelligent they are. These brilliant dames don’t realize that they are coming across as know-it-alls and bitches, or even as insecure. You don’t have to prove anything to a man. If you are smart, he will pick up on this without you having to wrap it in a bow and plop it down in front of him. Use your intelligence to make him think you are sassy: throw witty banter at him and give him a chance to see how good you are at playing a sexy game of verbal cat-and-mouse. 

Don't pretend you’re Kate Middleton. If you aren’t a social butterfly and you don’t have a fabulous life filled with champagne, fancy stilettoes, and glamorous charity balls, then don’t tell him you do to make him excited to be part of your life. If you actually spend your Friday nights eating ice cream out of the cartoon while you watch reruns of Roseanne and pet your cats, then be honest! Don’t apologize for who you are and don’t entice him with glitzy fibs. I’m sure you can come up with a fantastically funny and interesting way to make your life seem intriguing, no matter how many cats you have.

Risk losing him to your personal boundaries. When we love a man, a panic comes over us when he pulls back in the slightest way. Worrying that you might lose him can make you break a personal boundary: you start begging him to stay with you, you sleep with him too soon, you accept morsels from him when you know you deserve the whole pie, etc. Suddenly, your self-confidence starts to melt away. Make a list of your personal boundaries and make a promise to yourself that you will never break one for the love of a man. Wear a bracelet around your wrist if you need to, as a symbol of this pact you make with yourself.

Don’t reward him for bad behavior. This one is a biggie! When a man is acting less-than-chivalrous, we feel like he might be drifting. The gap feels horrible, so we try to reel him back in with love and attention. However, if a man acts like a jerk with you and you: call him to talk about it, apologize profusely to make him feel comfortable coming back, or basically break your back in any way to show him how much you miss him and love him and need him, you are indirectly telling him that he will get more attention and affection from you when he acts poorly! Shower him with love ONLY when he deserves it and be strong enough to refrain from doing so in the bad times. (Don’t be a nag or a dramaqueen either because negative attention is still more exciting and rewarding than no attention.)

Be a sexter! I don’t care if you’ve been married for years or are still honeymooning, find ways to use technology to add a li’l flare to your relationship. If text messaging existed in the Dark Ages, what do you think enchantresses would have texted to the men of the Round Table?  Certainly not, “How’s your day been, kind sir? Dinner’s in the springhouse.” Be creative and clever with your words. Make him think about your female magnetism when he isn’t around.

Keep things spicy… outside of your relationship. When you pick up a new hobby or passion, you create excitement in your life. You set off a firecracker in the middle of your dull routine, and this is something he’ll notice. He will probably even get jealous that he has lost some of your attention to this new passion, and suddenly he’ll start acting like he’s in competition for your favor! Men do love a healthy challenge.

Have a hint of vanity. Enchanting men starts with your ability to bask in male attention. If you can fall in love with yourself a little bit, he will find you so much more attractive.  He will see that you enjoy attention and are up for a game of seduction. Men love a gal who is into the art of mental foreplay. So, how do you do this? You make your best feature pop. Do you love your eyes? Your tush? Your supple breasts? Fall in love with yourself by concentrating on your favorite body part, and then every time he gives you sexual attention, tell yourself that he is turned on by that part of you. This will give you permission to bask, baby, bask!

Stop being mysterious. I roll my eyes when I read advice suggesting women should refrain from revealing themselves to a man in order to create mystery. Of course I don’t want you dumping all your emotional baggage onto a man, treating him like a priest in a confessional booth; however, the real mystery of a woman is revealed when she opens up. When you can sit with a man and expose beautiful, touching memories from your childhood or naughty secret pleasures you may have, suddenly he is watching this vulnerable, multi-faceted goddess-woman coming to life in front of him, and he is hooked.

A modern enchantress effortlessly lures men in by being true to herself and her feminine side. If you follow these tips, you are on the path to courtly love with your knight.

Malena Violeta