Communication is the Foundation for all Loving Relationships

ART: KEVIN KURECKI

Keeping the pathway clear between you and your man is essential to intimacy and a healthy love life. The key is learning to communicate. Good communication leads to a man feeling closer to you. Bad communication leads to a man pulling away. 

Article below by John Gray

marsvenus.com

Women tend to use rhetorical questions in relationships more than men. This does not mean men never use rhetorical questions, but when men do say them, it is usually during a fight.

If women used these phrases with a friendly tone, then they would be fine. But as soon as a woman adds frustration, anger, disappointment, worry, or urgency, these questions become offensive to men and can lead to a fight.

Each of these questions could easily be replaced with a more direct comment that would express her feelings, but in a way that a man will respect and actually listen to.

Here are the most common ones and my suggestions...

Common Question: How could you do that?
What He Hears: You are incompetent.
A Better Phrase: I don't like it when...

Common Question: What were you thinking?
What He Hears: You are stupid.
A Better Phrase: This doesn't make sense to me. I would think that...

Common Question: Why did you do that?
What He Hears: You are inefficient.
A Better Phrase: This may be using too much time. We could try to do it this way...

Common Question: What does this mean?
What He Hears: You can't be trusted.
A Better Phrase: It sounds to me like...

Common Question: What am I supposed to do now?
What He Hears: You created a problem for me.
A Better Phrase: I will need your help to...

Communication is the foundation for all loving relationships. Just a few small changes in how you speak to each other will improve the ways you love each other.

Grow in love,

John Gray