The Diary of a Feminine Woman
Today, I want to give a sneak peek into my life as a feminine energy woman. I want to share with you the beautiful exchanges I share with my masculine husband and also my internal struggles. I would say the most difficult thing for a feminine woman is learning when to not control a situation with her man and/or try to outsmart him with her opinions and “I can do it better attitude.”
It can be very hard to not manage things when your man is trying to take charge in life and love. As a rule, I would not offer advice to your man about his health, his work or business, finances, driving, or friends. This may sound strange but your offering advice makes him feel emasculated to a certain degree.
“I would not offer advice to your man about his health, his work or business, finances, driving, or friends”
Women these days want their masculine men to be leaders and to take charge and to romance them, but they constantly use their masculine energy to compete with their men’s thoughts and actions. This does not feel intrinsically right to a man. Not because you are not intelligent or capable, but because a man likes to steer his own ship. When a man makes a good decision and it works out, it feeds his soul. When a man makes a poor decision and suffers the consequences, it pushes him to do better. The push to do better must come from within him, and with your support, he can thrive.
Of course, as a feminine woman, you have veto powers in the relationship. You are not just a sheep, following him into the dark woods. If something does not feel right, you must express how it makes you feel. (Remember, your communication should not have any blame, attack, or criticism.) Like relationship expert, Pat Allen says, “as long as you do not have to call a doctor, lawyer, or the police, let him lead.”
“As a feminine woman, you have veto powers in the relationship”
For example, my husband is selling his business and on more than one occasion, I feel like I have better ideas than him on how to do it. Yet, I don’t want to use my interactions with him to compete. Instead, I nurture our masculine and feminine energy dynamics, so I leave him alone and let him figure it out on his own. If things don’t go as well as I think they could have gone, it’s okay. I let him learn by his own trials and errors. The only time I will interfere is if the health or livelihood of my children is at stake. Also, remember if a man asks for your opinion, you absolutely offer it in a non-threatening way. The fact that he is asking means he is still leading.
A masculine man’s unconscious desire is to have his thoughts respected, be admired, be the hero, and be appreciated. He does not want a woman competing with him on how to do things better and he doesn’t want a woman focusing on how he might fail. Here is a list of things I do and don’t do with my masculine man:
Money owed to him - I don’t nag him about getting his friend to pay back the money he lent him. I let him get frustrated on his own and he will be upset with his friend, not me for nagging at him or making him feel incompetent. When he gets paid back, I praise him for taking care of our finances.
Bad Friends - I don’t tell him that the business partner he has decided to befriend is probably not a good choice because he is a gossiper. I will let him find out on his own whether it is a good idea.
Financial decisions - I don’t interfere while he is deciding to change our cell phone company. I let him be the hero if it turns out to be a good idea. If it is a bad idea, I let him switch us back and then he is the hero! I make sure he knows how much I appreciate his efforts.
Vacation Plans - I acquiesce to his vacation plans for our Summer. He thinks it’s a good “idea” to not take such a big trip this year. I roll with it because I know that he wants to make me happy and he will figure out the best way to do that whether it’s a big trip or a smaller one. I respect his thinking on this matter.
When he is not eating healthy - I don’t mother him and offer advice on how to eat healthier. When he asks for certain groceries I get them; he is a grown man and I respect his decisions about food. He will find his own internal motivation when he is ready. It’s not my job to manage and control him. It feels like mothering to a masculine man and the sexual polarity diminishes in the relationship.
Sleeping in on weekends - He loves to sleep in on weekends and loves when I lay in bed with him. I am a morning person! Yet, I grab my laptop and coffee and offer my time to him as a gift for all he does for me. I don’t complain and try to change him. Plus, I wake up early and jump out of bed all the other days.
The way I use my feminine energy is a way that feels good to my masculine husband. I am soft on the outside (strong on the inside), easy, sensual, connected to myself, receptive, and respectful of his natural masculine tendencies to compete, control, and be the leader and hero. I don’t enter the battlefield with him. What I get back in return is tenfold. He gives me love, affection, adoration, and loyalty, and it’s amazing!
I am sharing my husband's Valentine’s day handwritten note to me below to show you what beautiful feminine energy creates:
“To the most beautiful woman in the world,
I can’t imagine life without you, my love. Every day, I wake up and consider myself the luckiest man in the world. You bring so much light and love into my world. The energy of your love is intoxicating and breathes life into me. I never believed that I could love anyone more than myself, that I would put someone else before me. Today and for the rest of the years we will spend together, I can honestly say that I will give my last breathe for you. Without you, I would have no purpose in life. Thank you for loving me so unconditionally. For always believing in me and seeing the best in me. I vow to you that I will live the rest of my life for you, to make you happy and fulfill your every dream. I love you more than anything in this world. You are my all. Love you till the end of time.
Forever your devoted,
Husband”
This note expresses the masculine and feminine energy dance. This note tells the story of magical feminine energy turning a boy into a selfless, devoted man. After 8 years, he is my respected man and I am his cherished woman. So, believe me when I say it’s very hard to restrain yourself from managing, controlling, or criticizing your masculine man. Yet, if you honestly respect his thoughts, ideas, and most of his decisions, he will go above and beyond to love you in the deepest most beautiful way. 💕