He Lost Interest In You, Now What?
Kristina Marchant's article expresses the essence of "The Way of the Goddess" better then any relationship coach I have encountered. Lately, I have heard too many stories about women who seem to have a great thing flowing with a new man and then suddenly he loses interest and the wheels come undone for these women. If you are one of those women remember the answer is not in what he is doing or thinking. The answer is in how you are being and reacting. Focus on you and an interested man can always turn around and move towards you again. Enjoy article below :)
He Lost Interest In You, Now What?
Written By: Kristina Marchant - ConnectWithHisHeart.com
If your relationship has done a 180 and you are now pursuing the man you love instead of being adamantly pursued by him, I know exactly how you feel. I dated a few guys who went from in love to missing in action. If he lost interest in you, it’s still not too late—it wasn’t too late for me.
If you follow me online, you know that the man I’m with now was once a drifter. He called me his miracle in the beginning of the relationship and then he didn’t call me at all. I was able to save this relationship, unlike those few before him who also lost interest in me, because I learned a few things about men and love.
Here’s a powerful tip to help you gain back his interest now that he has lost interest in you:
If He Lost Interest, Sit On Your Hands To Regain His Love
In my past, when a man lost interest in me, I would start to panic. I would do whatever I could to pull him toward me. I would give him gifts, text him invites, offer to clean his house and help him sort out his emotional problems. I become a mom, a buddy and a psychologist all wrapped up in one. But what I didn’t become was his girlfriend again.
When you chase a man by becoming a shape-shifter for him (“I’ll shift into any role you need of me!”) you end up pushing him further away. Shape-shifting has a waft of neediness and desperation and a man will sense that all your polite gestures aren’t free. He will begin to feel manipulated and obliged to you and that’s smothering.
On the other hand, you can’t push him away either. In my past, while I was pulling a man toward me by chasing him, I was also, at the same time, pushing him away with rejecting behavior. I was so wrapped up in him and worried that he’d abandon me, any gesture he would make to come close and get to know me would be met with hesitation and a heap of nerves.
Instead of pull/push a man in the attempt to make him regain interest, it’s best to do what I call sitting on your hands. Do nothing to chase him and focus instead on remaining still and calm and having welcoming energy oozing from an open heart.
Don’t call him or invite him places or give him gifts or cute “friendly” text messages, etc. Just live your life, breathe, feel your feelings and when he contacts you, be welcoming and inviting. Listen to him, laugh with him and let him set the pace of the conversation. Treat him like a casual friend who always brings a smile to your face when she calls you.
And also be honest; if it bothers you that he hasn’t called in a few days, tell him how you feel. Say, “I feel sad and disregarded. I don’t want to date a man who goes MIA for days. It feels bad.” Then refrain from any more words and see what he has to say. Don’t let the silence make you uncomfortable—let him be on the spot and let him do the back-pedaling to get back in your good graces.
When you can stop “moving” in the relationship and just stay grounded, you will make a man feel that you are confident and stable. This is attractive and will offer him the emotional room he needs to realize why he loves you.