What Masculine Men Want from Feminine Women
Hello Beautiful Goddesses,
I have been wanting to post more teachings from one of my favorite relationship coaches, Dr. Pat Allen. She is a pioneer in feminine and masculine energy dynamics. Her teachings are life-changing. Today, I will be posting an excerpt from her book entitled, “Getting To I do.”
Please remember that at the core of her work, she is speaking about a fiercely strong woman who is highly evolved in the areas of self-love, mental awareness, and emotional management. This type of woman allows herself to surrender and play with the energies of romantic love. This type of woman also becomes a man’s oracle (allowing the divine to provide wise and insightful counsel through oneself to another), and inspires him to grow spiritually from a selfish boy to a giving man. So, let’s get to it. I am excited!!! See below.
EXCERPT BELOW from Chaper 6 of “Getting to I do” by Dr. Pat Allen
“If based on my system, you choose to be the feminine energy in a relationship, it means that you will be looking for certain qualities from that masculine man who would best compliment you and he will be likewise expecting certain qualities from you. This chapter will distill his qualities and then guide you through your own corresponding role.
The male energy is the giving, initiating, leading, active partner who elicits surrender, receptivity and bonding from his partner. When the masculine energy gives, protects, and cherishes, he is penetrating the other’s defenses to surrender to the pleasure of the relationship.
“When the masculine energy gives, protects , and cherishes, he is penetrating the other’s defenses to surrender to the pleasure of the relationship”
A masculine man is a natural developer of anything that he sees and that includes a piece of land or a woman. With a woman, he thinks, “She is going to be great if we just do this or that, and I'll show her how.”
Therefore, one of the most important qualities your masculine man will look for from you is joyous receptivity. By this, I mean not only that he will expect you to receive gifts with joy, but also the things that don't feel too good to, such as how-to-do-it messages. A man does not want to fight tooth and nail to get a thought into your thick skull. He wants you to be receptive to his opinions, suggestions, and plans.
“Therefore, one of the most important qualities your masculine man will look for from you is joyous receptivity”
Although, you must respect your masculine man, you will not try to earn his respect. Instead, you will want him to cherish your feelings. Unfortunately, the more you intimidate a masculine man with your respectability, the less he will be able to see you as sexually desirable. Men with masculine-based energy systems tend to want to make love to women who want to be cherished, rather than women who want to be respected.
“Unfortunately, the more you intimidate a masculine man with your respectability, the less he will be able to see you as sexually desirable”
A second thing that a man wants from a woman is that she be available for him. That is why if you are a career woman instead of a woman with a career, your time will be limited and you will not be compatible with a masculine man. A masculine man will want you to be available for him to play with and to have sex with, and he will want you to be responsive to his love-making because he is not just a taker who is in it for his own pleasure. He wants to give you pleasure so that you will totally surrender to him. He will take particular joy in making you feel wonderful by bringing you to orgasm.
“He wants to give you pleasure so that you will totally surrender to him”
Feminine women surrender and bond to men through their bodies, through making love. When a woman gives her body to a man, there's a strong chance that she is going to become bonded to him - even after only one good sexual encounter. For this reason, it's easy to bond to the wrong man. A masculine man knows if he gets you into your knickers long enough and pleasures you, you’re his. Before sex, he may have been a monster, but all of a sudden, after good sex, he gets better looking and nicer. But what is really happening is that he is pleasing you and you are rationalizing away his negative elements. Don't do it.
“Feminine women surrender and bond to men through their bodies, through making love”
The basic qualities you will be looking for from your masculine man are that he be joyously generous, physically protective, and willing to cherish your painful feelings before his own.
Generosity is a very basic trait in a masculine man. If he has money to spend, he will do so joyously. He will not ask you to pay your way. If he invites you out for a date for a trip, he will assume the responsibility for paying. Masculine men see their money as a way to have fun, not exert control. If they have it to spend, they do so with pleasure. Money is just the scorecard for the game; it is not the goal of a man's life.
“The basic qualities you will be looking for from your masculine man are that he be joyously generous, physically protective, and willing to cherish your painful feelings before his own”
A masculine man will want to provide money so that you will feel safe and secure, and so that you can enjoy life, especially after you marry. He will show his love by taking care of his money-making career. He knows that if he slacks off in the area of money-making, he risks the loss of respect for himself. In contrast, as a feminine-energy woman, you will be relationship-oriented. You will not have career and money as your first goals; therefore, you will need a masculine men to give you status (marriage) and security…..
A masculine man must be passionate about his work. It doesn't matter if he's a bank president or a janitor. A man with a boring job that does not excite his enthusiasm and creativity will not earn respect from you. To maintain respect, your masculine man will act in a disciplined manner physically, mentally and emotionally. If he binges on food, drinks, drugs, or sex, or becomes a workaholic or emotionally binges on rages and violence, you will lose respect for him and inevitably be unable to be sexually responsive.
A man will maintain his woman's respect by making and keeping his commitments to the best of his ability. Any sloppiness with commitments will indicate that he doesn’t cherish your feelings and wants his feelings cherished instead….
”As a feminine-energy woman, you will be relationship-oriented. You will not have career and money as your first goals”
It is important that you do not rationalize away your feelings in favor of his. If he is the masculine energy and you are the feminine, it is his job to cherish your feelings ahead of his own….
A masculine man must know what he thinks and wants. Knowing what he thinks and wants allows him to focus better, and a focused, thinking masculine man will act decisively, which will elicit respect from you, his feminine woman. He will say “We're going to go there. We're going to do this. I'm going to get that job. I'm going to build this house. I'm going to provide for you. How do you feel about that?” And you will tell him how you feel, whether it's positive or negative. Of course, in order to get what you want, you must give your man what he wants, unless what he wants is immoral or unethical or causes you discomfort. You cannot use power plays, because in the long run, they don't work. The big error many feminine women make is to manipulate their men into giving back, instead of waiting for their men to give first so they can give back.
“If he is the masculine energy and you are the feminine, it is his job to cherish your feelings ahead of his own”
Although you will want your masculine man to lead, you will not like being controlled, and sometimes it does feel like a man just wants to control you. If you find yourself in this situation, my suggestion is to say something like “I'm not comfortable doing this your way. Do you have another suggestion that might feel better to me?”
If you speak to him this way, I can almost promise you that your masculine man will be happy to oblige, because it means that he's cherishing your negative feelings ahead of his own. By putting your feelings before his own, he is showing his commitment to you, and this will allow you to respect him and follow his lead.
Feminine women literally gush painful feelings verbally, and they need to know that all those painful feelings will be accepted, even if not approved of, by their men. Masculine energy men like to nurture their loved ones. Their own internal feminine aspect wishes to empathize and share. They are not “macho men” out of touch with their feelings and unwilling to be open to another’s pain. Instead, a masculine man is confident that he can cherish his woman until a solution can be found. He does not run away from her pain nor does he expect her to handle it alone.”
END OF EXCERPT
There you go! I hope you enjoyed it and read something that sparked something inside of you. I promise these practices work. I know because I practice them everyday and I am a well loved, adored and cherished feminine woman. 💕
Much Love,
Malena xoxo