The Love Deep Within You
My husband (El Guapo) told me the other day that when he looks at me, he gets butterflies in his stomach. That was the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard and it made me feel so good. I have come so far in my experience in love. I have worked so hard on my healing, and my life reflects this beautifully. If I had to tell my readers what the most important step I have taken is, it would be learning how to feel my painful emotions and learning to make myself feel love and joy from deep within myself, without needing anything to change on the outside (people, places, things.) I am the master of my world.
“I have come so far in my experience in love”
As I coach clients, I notice how often they get lost in their emotional patterns and repeat the same negative experiences over and over again. They fall deeper into their triggers and can't find a way out of their destructive cycles. The truth is that some women just haven’t hit their rock bottom yet. They think they can still solve their relationship problems with the same thinking and behaviors that have kept them stuck in the first place. I know this cycle well and it is exhausting. So, what is it that finally makes a woman find the courage to change?
“Some women just haven’t hit their rock bottom yet”
It is deep pain and suffering. It is the awful feeling of, “I can't take this anymore, there has to be another way.” When a woman hits this point, she realizes something must change or she will close her heart forever. If she is really honest, she also realizes the necessary change is within herself.
You attract a partner and your experiences in love that reflect your dominant emotions around intimacy (fear, scarcity, neediness, anger,) and what you believe about yourself. Period. If you attract men that can’t love or commit and it makes you feel unworthy, it is because you can't love or commit to yourself and in your heart, you believe you are unworthy. A man can only love and give to you at the same level with which you give and love yourself. He is a mirror.
“A man can only love and give to you at the same level with which you give and love yourself”
I hate to confront clients with this truth, but I must. I have to be honest with them. Many clients shut down or feel offended no matter how nicely I transmit this message. Some get mad yet, most use the sadness of this truth as fuel to take a deeper dive into themselves.
The key message I send them with on their journey is “No man is going to save you.” It just doesn't work that way. The only love that will save you is inside yourself. It is the love that rests below your pain. It is the love that sits deep within you that is connected to the divine. It comes from the spiritual realm (no matter what your beliefs.) It is bigger than you and it sits patiently waiting for you to clear your painful energy blocks so it can flow up into your heart and enliven your spirit once again.
“No man is going to save you”
Relationships are magical because they keep pushing you into this process of purification of your heart. When you look for your salvation in a relationship, it will always bring you to your knees. Yet, it is this suffering that will bring you back to the light/love within you.
A Goddess is special because she will use her suffering like an ancient map, guiding her toward where she needs to heal and connect back to her divine source. Her goal is not to finally get the feeling of wholeness from a man. Her goal is freedom and liberation from the suffering that comes from being tethered to another person’s validation and fluctuating emotional security. She uses suffering as an instrument in her quest for freedom.
“A Goddess is special because she will use her suffering like an ancient map”
So, if you are suffering now, see it as a message. The divine is calling you back home. The divine is signaling you to stop wandering lost in the forest. Turn within and build your home, find the treasures in your own heart. Then, step out into the world and every relationship will be transformed before your very eyes.
Much Love,
Malena xoxo
artoflovingaman.com
Instagram: @artoflovingaman
For one-on-one Relationship Coaching services, contact me at: theartoflovingaman@gmail.com
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